How to Nurture a Responsible, Caring Child

Think of this ... a child who puts her dirty clothes in the linen basket rather than leaving them on the floor, who tidies her room without being told, who clears the dinner table without complaint and who happily gives up a morning to help out with the grocery shopping. Every parent's fantasy? Yes! Will it really happen? Realistically, probably not. But it is possible to raise a responsible child, one who will do her fair part of the chores with only the odd complaint - if you start early!

Toddlers can't be expected to be responsible for regular chores, but it's never too early to give your child some responsibility. As most pre-school children like to copy their parents, now might be the ideal moment to start to teach your child that chores are there for every one to take their fare share of. Assign him safe and easy chores, such as picking up toys, clear the table of unbreakable items, mixing or stirring while you're cooking, dry unbreakable dishes, pots and pans etc. Also teach him routinely to put his trash into the wastepaper basket, trash or recycling bin.

To keep him keen though, you'll have to ensure that chores are fun. Supply placemats with child appeal when he's laying the table for lunch (or why not make your own by laminating pictures taken from some of the books in Scruffy's Bookshop?), dance around the room while dusting or why not play a rhythm on the dried pots and pans with a wooden spoon?

Make sure chores are undertaken by the whole family. The family that cleans, cooks or gardens together will get more accomplished, and have a lot more fun doing it. As long as chores are handed out fairly (and children are very sharp-eyed when it comes to equitable division of work) then this kind of family togetherness will encourage your children to ontinue to do their share as they get older.

Keep your demands reasonable, and even if your toddler is enthusiastic about helping with the chores, don't expect him to more than he is capable or willing to undertake. This might cause him to become resentful of helping out as he gets older, when his more expert help will be much more useful to you.

Try not to complain about having to do chores yourself. If you moan and complain everytime you have to wash the dishes or push a vacuum cleaner around the house, you're sending a very easily understood message to your toddler that chores are unpleasant and boring, and to be avoided if at all possible. Instead try to make them more fun by playing your favourite tunes or whistling as you work.

It's likely that you'll end up being amazed at how many household chores your average toddler is capable of undertaking, but do remember that most, if not all chores will need adult supervision and possibly assistance. But try not to intervene too much, a chore that's done "all by myself" is always more satisfying for a toddler - and that satisfaction will begin to lay the foundations for your child to grow up helpful and responsible around the home.