In The Womb:The Crucial First Step

Current research indicates that the conditions of pregnancy shape every aspect of a child’s later life, and it is useful for parents to understand this fact and all that it implies.

The environment in which the developing fetus will grow is affected by the mother’s well being at the time of her pregnancy. Her physical health, as well as her state of mind, are key to the baby’s development. When a mother cannot keep and raise her baby, complications arise to threaten the basic health of the growing fetus. She does not have the freedom emotionally to love the baby or to look forward to holding, feeding and nurturing her infant. Often she is frightened and angry about her circumstances while simultaneously suffering from the potential loss of the relationship with the birthfather and her sense of security in her own family. If she is confused and anxious, conditions exist for her child to be born with attachment issues. Among the many factors affecting this problem are a denial of the pregnancy, a rejection of the fetus, substance abuse, inadequate prenatal maternal care, and the physical immaturity so common in teenage mothers.

The consequence is that trust may not develop in the womb. Instead, the birthmother is only partially bonding and connecting to her child. The baby is to a greater or lesser degree left to develop in an isolated world. Later, many of these children describe themselves as islands, separated from meaningful human connections. Since the developing fetus is so exquisitely attuned to the nuances of what is happening inside and outside the womb, the circumstances of an unsupported pregnancy will shape and focus the direction the baby will take after birth.

The physical health of the birthmother, determined by her diet, lifestyle and emotional state during pregnancy as well as the health of the birthfather at the time of conception will significantly affect the life of the growing child. According to noted pediatrician, T. Berry Brazelton, if the mother suffers from malnutrition, it can interfere with the development of as much as 40 percent of the cells in the fetal brain. If the birthmother is a teenager or if she is abusing substances, there is a serious risk of premature birth, which compromises the health of the developing organs and/or brain and central nervous system and results in an immature nervous system. Learning difficulties may emerge as the child develops, and as demands are made on the child’s intellectual ability, the sense of apathy that marks the child with fetal alcohol syndrome will surface if alcohol has been abused by either parent.

Since there are gaps in the knowledge that adoptive parents have about the maternal environment which nurtured their children, they need to assume that there were at least a few deficits and their commitment to parenting becomes far more challenging and difficult than conventional child rearing implies. To fill these gaps, it is recommended that parents prepare themselves with the latest in neonatal and child development information that is available with particular attention to attachment issues. In order to raise happy and healthy children, parents must balance their love with preparedness, determination and patience.